WITH REFERENCE TO CHRISTOPHER MATTHEW WHITE.
I would like to display the ten things that I would never do...

So, I would never...

1) ...have a period. More due to natural selection than choice, but even given the choice I'd opt out, doesn't sound like a lot of fun.
2) ...Set fire to myself or anyone else who didn't deserve it, I mean imagine the process, you'd just have to step back and look at yourself. "What am I doing, this is just really going to hurt."
3) ...Watch another episode of Torchwood. I put this in tentatively on the basis that I probably will, but I really don't want to. It's devillishly compelling but essentially tripe.
4) ...indulge in coitus with an animal or a child... it's just not worth the bother.
5) ...take off all my skin to reveal the truth behind my human facade.
6) ...play Hockey again.
7) ...use ear-buds to clean my ears again, despite the cravings and the temporary bliss. This is the second time I have goven myself an ear infection... idiot.
8) ...survive a nuclear war.
9) ...knowingly put money into the Bono coffers, either by buying a U2 record (god forbid) or staying near a place that has ever played a U2 song or thought about doing. that might not be very workable, but the sentiment is sound.
10) ...eat worms.

HEATHCLIFF, IT'S ME I'M CATHY. COME HOME! IT'S SO CO-O-O-OLD, LET ME INTO YOUR WINDOW.

That title bears no relevance to the content of this post yet it was just screaming to be involved, for what serious, God-fearing blog is complete without a Kate Bush reference? I have now to render fruitless the first statement of the previous sentence by bringing relevance to the title.

On the way back from the NUS/Press Association media awards today we of the Quench/Gair Rhydd runners-up team (except that Geordie one and his "I'm so bloody diverse" award) worked our way through an amazing array of songs including Wuthering Kate Bush's Heights. It was a wonderful experience replete with some spectacular word-forgetting and tune betrayal.

The event itself had it's ups and downs but was largely a good craic. Rajesh Mirchandani set proceedings off with a touch of class yet that class was rapidly revealed to be phony when the three women from the Sheila's Wheels adverts rolled out to sing some covers. I'd rather listen to a tape recording of my own death.

Why this was arranged I will never know but the DJ made up for it by crippling to our team's Widetop inspired clamourings for My Chemical Romance. Raise a glass to the Warwick Boar: hats off.

*SADLY MIST
Due to prior commitments I was forced to miss the performance by our very own Daniel Meadows. Bad news as I quite fancied the prospect of Daniel's Meadow hitting Birt's Acre for a slew of pastural Online Media debate.

Here is what I can garner from my peers' musings:

• Journo's Journey: Capture Wales is Daniel's brainchild which seeks to give a voice to anyone with vocal chords on the basis that "every story is of interest to someone somewhere."
• Emma Barnett: "The basic notion is that if people have the tools to create their own content, they will do that, and that this will result in an emerging global conversation." A quote from Dan Gilmour's book: We The Media which sums up the impetus behind Mr. Meadow's project.
• Through a Glass, Sharply: Meadows and Burton should really sit down and hammer one out.
• Hard Blogging: A raised glass to the championing of the little man. There is no need for these stories to offer anything new or ground-breaking, they are fine as mere curios, they need be no more, and that is not to belittle them by any means.
• "death of the author"...?: The Capture Wales team were astonished by the honesty of the people involved and how much they were willing to give. I like this idea that people have a genuine desire to tell their stories and this is a viable platform for that to happen.
• Will Dean: didn't see it either, he was busy smooching Lauren Laverne.
• The Sparkly World of Alexis: Trainee Journalist: "everyone has a story to tell but not everyone can master the QWERTY keyboard." Meadows argues that this is a reason to give them the means to tell that story. Alexis also raises the debate over Meadows' lecture style (reading from a script) causing a rift in the MagLab.
• James Franey's Blog: Deaf ears for Meadows' preaching. His assertion that everyone has a voice should rely on that voice being presented well and succinctly. Capture Wales is not that.
• The Dirty World Of Student Journalism: Another fellow absconder. On looking at the site it is less journalism than an extension of blogs and online networking providing a nice ccounterpoint to traditional News websites.
• Gecko Writer: Meadows claimed that Capture Wales was the only truly interactive form of media on TV, and only in Wales. This may be the case now but the future's bright, the future's riddled with something called UGC(?)
• R & R: If viewed through marketing goggles the Digital Storytelling concept Meadows is peddling falls flat on its lens. If nothing of immediate value is being contributed by Digital Storytelling, does it have a legitimate and sustainable place in the media world?
• Melmoth's Wanderings: Reading a thesis on 'interactivity' word-for-word with your eyes down, does present an illuminating irony. The wheat must be separated from the chaff in order to push Digital Storytelling forward.
• I am Serious, and Don't Call me Shirley: With reference to the BBC's VideoNation equivalent project of some years ago the content on Capture Wales appears to have regressed in quality.
• The Beard: The best of the Capture Wales crop makes it onto the BBC2W graveyard slot: an opportunity for the media moguls to make money without having to produce the content themselves. Sadly the content only ranges from enlightening to utterly mundane.
• The Lord Blog: Ignoring the advances of the new media realm is ignoring the world around you and most importantly your audience. Some 'moving' images from Daniel Meadows.
• The Boy With a Pipe: Capture Wales is destined for the periphery, in light of more accessible community based websites like Youtube and Myspace. What is the role of the editor in these UGC creations... when does your free voice become distorted?
• Kate Mallord: The potential problem of digital exclusion stretches beyond physical means as even if the world was given a videophone, the Murdochs and Googles could still exploit their output.
• The Melting Pot: How far is UGC actually threatening Journalists, it's not as if someone who phones in a mass of police surging down their road is asked to produce a report asap (and pronounce that as it sounds not as separate letters... it's so much more powerful that way). One fifth of British people can't still can't use a computer, so getting onto the streets is still viable.
• Emily Newsom: Online Reflection: Most 'interactive' services are, in actual fact, only 'reactive' according to Meadows. Pressing you red button, text votes and the like are just cynical tokenism. Capture Wales is truly interactive.
• Seventy Percent Nostalgia: how will we sort thorugh the detritus on offer in order to find the genuinely worthwhile stuff? The media 'newser' has no real impact what with the domination by the Murdochs of the media playground.
• Thinking Cap On: The journalist has a right to protect his or her trade rather than hand over the pen to any illiterate or disadvantaged person out there, just like a surgeon wouldn't hand the knife to a pedestrian and take a back seat.
• Diary of a Madman: Why is this project a threat? people are only going to look and listen if they want to, if it grabs them, if it's interesting! As meadows pointed out the established media fraternity knows what its people want and can give it to them. If the media wants Daniel's stuff then so be it... but don't hold your breath.
• Media Musings: Journalists must be as apt at telling stories for themselves as for other people. "News is people," said Harold Evans (good first name... pity about the surname) and therefore surely interactive "peoples" media must work alongside traditional reactive media.
• On The Cut: None of this is new; the concept of real people creating video; the concept of 'newsers' deciding what is newsworthy and what isn't; the hype attached to new media formats. attention spans are waning and hype is increasing, it's getting more and more difficult to find good reading.
• Rutherford's Tiny Tiny Mind: by Meadows' own admission these digital stories are a turn off but his enthusiasm for the cause was a turn on. The line needs to be drawn on relevance, and what one wants to gain from the journalistic experience, whether one wants to tell other peoples' stories or their own.
• Severs' Blog: These stories could provide a resource for news gatherers to pick up ideas but will never have the general appeal needed to succeed on a larger platform. They are too small-fry and introspective.
• Chris White: Yet another fellow absconder but with fairly passed comment. The recognised media needn't lower its standards to cater for this form of "news" as the people haven't exhibited a desire for it. They are happy with Youtube and the like for these purposes.
• Journalism Blog 2006-2007 or: How I learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Blog: A fine and professional talk from a well-versed online impressario. These videos are snapshots of life and this can only be a good thing.

Well, that succinctly sums up the views of my esteemed peers, and I hope I have done them all justice. Anyone who feels hard done by can happily take it up with my online lawyer.

So what do I think about the dawn of Digital Storytelling (if it can be called the dawn)? It is covenient that Dan Worth is so alphabetically chaallenged as it is with him that I am most in agreement. While I can see that the inclusion of these everyman video stories into the journalistic sphere and expecting people to take an active interest may be a bridge too far. The concept of bringing these methods of entry to the unwashed masses is definitely a good thing.

People are demanding more and more input and they are now getting it, with evermore options for feedback, and not just this but a chance to develop from a story on their own terms. It seems a bit naive to expect quality across the board but the option should be available and naybe the fact that the good ones are hard to find among the bad ones could itself be solved by the users...

1. ratings systems.
2. hit logs.
3. comments.

these and more allow the better ones to stand out of their own volition without needing an editor to sift, while the weaker efforts fall by the wayside. In Dan's words (Worth, not Meadows):

"If this new age of user-generated content is opening up avenues of artistic creation to those who would never have even thought about it before then how can it be anything but a positive thing?"

FEATURE IDEA

Zac Crain for Mayor of Dallas! I intend to investigate the Blog as a legitimate political platform as compared to the traditional media. How far is it possible to run a campaign for very little money via the internet using New Media avenues for your advertising and link to the voters?

Zac Crain is essentially trying to do just this. He has had interviews with local Dallas Bloggers and within which he has discussed the legitimacy of the blog, I hope to contact him to conduct an interview of my own. I will also look at the impact of Webcameron, and 18 Doughty Street as viable political media.

With online politicising there is a whole new audience of young web savvy politically turned off readers. Is this a perfect resource for the aspiring candidate if they can motivate that force to their aid.

Can the Blog ever be viewed as equal to the newspaper as a political platform?

TURK A LOOK AT THIS
The people at Wolong Panda Reserve near Chengdu in China are inundated with pandas and so I feel i must make it my mission to help them out by adopting as many as possible, so here is Dirk's brother Turk, fresh out of the cramped container off the rubbish plane...

adopt your own virtual pet!

Good luck to him!

COOEE BONO!
Bono Vox is a blackhole sucking all that is pure, reasonable and... well... just plain acceptable about humanity, into a charmless, smug void. Then casting purile filthy music, unfiltered worrying self-idolatry and natty sunglasses back into our faces such that we can't get away from him.

The masses kiss his cloven hooves and sing blankly along to the soundtrack to the end of all that we, as sensible human beings should hold dear: U2. Bono, the poison dwarf prince, prances along, dribbling a tune from his Pied Pipe while the supposedly civilised world skips, doe-eyed and soporific, along behind him, enraptured by his sickening drawl, like rats to the river of Hamlin.

There is hope however; on a website dedicated to his demise, in a dark corner of the message board I found this comment from a believer, defending their evil king:

"lol you people are sad, why would you waste your time trying to degrade an artist that is considered a legend amongst rock, and inducted into the hall of fame which means he's along the same sentence as elvis presley and michael jackson and led zeppelin. you people are blind, ignorant and jealous. surely you are just trying to gain power by belittling a great man...it's impossible. you can't expect everyone to hate bono.

what's funny is, people criticize him, but he still continues to do charity - which speaks for itself. he doesn't really give a sht about his image, wether people hate him or not, he is doing it for poverty's sake.

in a world like this, it's better to have one man sing about poverty...than have another heavy metal group worshipping demons. and what do you gain out of complaining? nothing. i give bono credit for having the guts to actually work with george bush, rather than pan him behind the back.

go to hell."


I fear however, that it is this poor simpleton who shall be going to hell, rather than we "blind ignorant and jealous" folks, singing and dancing along behind his idiot-king. So, Bono can be mentioned along the same sentence as EP, MJ and Led Zep he says, but what is that sentence... hmmmm... too easy?... nope... Elvis Presley, Michael Jackson and Led Zeppelin are worthy members of the hall of fame (a futile venture anyway but that is by the by) whereas Bono is just a cunt. Is that the sentence?...is it?

A great man once said: "Forgive them father, they know not what they do," and despite his protestations to the contrary, it wasn't Bono.

*HOPE SPRINGS ETERNAL
Peter Clifton, head of BBC online, arrived in boisterous manner (he didn't hit anyone on the way in: he just warned us of his own propensity to swear a lot). His message was fraught with danger yet laced with hope.

It is often disheartening to be repeatedly informed of the growth of UGC. Apparently now everyone Tom, Dick or Harry can be a journalist, and not only this but the BBC are providing free online lessons for these people to better their skills. After the 7/7 bombings the BBC was inundated with unsolicited photos, videos and information from people of all kinds, not asking for money but just hoping that they can aid the spread of information about this event (and see their name in lights).

In many ways this is an excellent vindication of the journalists' role: people want news. People have an innate thirst for knowledge, and also have a desire to be a part of it, which is wonderful.

In other ways this is depressing, I am paying massive monies to learn a dying art, or am I? Mr. Clifton was keen to point out that he valued base journalism skills as a prerequisite for anyone wishing to secure a job in his team, even throwing a swear or two into the mix to make it extra clear.

Online will definitely have the lion's share of the future and with it will come a certain democratisation of content but Journalistic skills will always have their place. Thankyou Mr. Clifton.

RICHARD BURTON, estranged brother of Tim (my mind is a turgid melange of original and fresh thoughts. Via my bulging wad I will pour them forth into the cinematic cauldron, gaining legitimacy from Donny Jepp and Belena Conham Harter) Burton, made his merry way to our friend Birt's Acre.

The (embittered?) ex-editor of the Telegraph's pioneering online service gave an interesting insight into the workings of this new-media meat market. Most interesting to me as an avid fan of the feline companion was his comparison of the new media reader to the Cat and the print (newspaper primarily) reader to the Dog.

His point was that Newspaper readers become loyal to a trusted brand like a Dog is (apparently) loyal to its master/mistress, or whatever PC luddites require me to say. A newspaper is a man/womans' best friend and he/she will stick by it to the bitter end. The new media reader, on the other hand, lazily flits from page to page 'imprinting' whichever news site provides them with the most arresting content, appearance and service, like a cat purring for whoever feeds it.

I naturally felt drawn to the new media reader (I think I have sufficiently rinsed that piece of literary niceness and so will attempt not to use it again) due to my adoration for all things four-legged, furry and feline (no disrespect to disabled cats with fewer legs, but I simply like them less) . Burton's point is apt. We must as journalists of the electronic age be conscious of the fickle readership and endeavour to grab them and hold them for as long as possible with concise yet interesting writing, well structured and easily navigable layouts and as much peripheral 'novelty' and access points as possible. More and more people want to be spoon fed, and then be able to freely critique the feeding, like if you left a pad and paper next to a cat's saucer for it to leave feedback after it's meal.

Not that it would have the capacity to do so, as:

1. it would be too lazy, and:
2. I'm almost certain it wouldn't possess the necessary physical attributes. Although, that said point 1 might just be so apparent, that cats have yet to show us their full potential simply because they can't be bothered. Hmmm, that's a thinker.

I'd like to think we can change our online audience with good writing, and command their attention and loyalty but reality seems to be saying otherwise. Maybe in the future as Newspapers die and the internet becomes more and more powerful, brand will come into the equation and beautiful, flippant, strong-willed cats will become slobbering, mindless, blindly loyal dogs.