COOEE BONO!
Bono Vox is a blackhole sucking all that is pure, reasonable and... well... just plain acceptable about humanity, into a charmless, smug void. Then casting purile filthy music, unfiltered worrying self-idolatry and natty sunglasses back into our faces such that we can't get away from him.

The masses kiss his cloven hooves and sing blankly along to the soundtrack to the end of all that we, as sensible human beings should hold dear: U2. Bono, the poison dwarf prince, prances along, dribbling a tune from his Pied Pipe while the supposedly civilised world skips, doe-eyed and soporific, along behind him, enraptured by his sickening drawl, like rats to the river of Hamlin.

There is hope however; on a website dedicated to his demise, in a dark corner of the message board I found this comment from a believer, defending their evil king:

"lol you people are sad, why would you waste your time trying to degrade an artist that is considered a legend amongst rock, and inducted into the hall of fame which means he's along the same sentence as elvis presley and michael jackson and led zeppelin. you people are blind, ignorant and jealous. surely you are just trying to gain power by belittling a great man...it's impossible. you can't expect everyone to hate bono.

what's funny is, people criticize him, but he still continues to do charity - which speaks for itself. he doesn't really give a sht about his image, wether people hate him or not, he is doing it for poverty's sake.

in a world like this, it's better to have one man sing about poverty...than have another heavy metal group worshipping demons. and what do you gain out of complaining? nothing. i give bono credit for having the guts to actually work with george bush, rather than pan him behind the back.

go to hell."


I fear however, that it is this poor simpleton who shall be going to hell, rather than we "blind ignorant and jealous" folks, singing and dancing along behind his idiot-king. So, Bono can be mentioned along the same sentence as EP, MJ and Led Zep he says, but what is that sentence... hmmmm... too easy?... nope... Elvis Presley, Michael Jackson and Led Zeppelin are worthy members of the hall of fame (a futile venture anyway but that is by the by) whereas Bono is just a cunt. Is that the sentence?...is it?

A great man once said: "Forgive them father, they know not what they do," and despite his protestations to the contrary, it wasn't Bono.